Recently.

WALT: Classified. 

The past few days have been rough. I feel as if I am stuck in a trench surrounded by enemies. I know it seems as if the feeling is non existent until you have found out what I've been through. Sadly I am not aloud to say for the sake of the way you look at me but you have to trust me on this you will never look at me the same way again. Only a handful of people know but I even regret telling a few of them. I feel as if I'm being watched in every moment of my existence. As if my own shadow has turned against me. With the chain of recent events I am not sure I should even post this. As my fingers move a physical weight pulls down on my shoulders not hard enough for me to scream but mark my word's "It hurts". Just think of some of the things that could have happened, something that I could have done or maybe the actions of another. Either way the pain is ever growing. It is starting to get unbearable, watching the days fly by without being able to do anything. I don't want the pain anymore. I know I can't stop what is going to happen, but I know I can't try. Despite me not being to prevent it, I can definitely slow it down. I didn't want it to end this way, but what am I able to do. If you ever do find out about what happened or even what is going to happen, I ask you to keep it a secret until further notice. I feel bad and not whoops I dropped mum's china plate bad or even whoops I lost dad's wallet bad, But a whoops I bumped him off the grand canyon bad, you know that is not what happened but it feel's like I did. Sorry to bother you with my issues but I needed to tell someone. I ask you leave a comment for the sake of conversation and company. If you have made it this fr into the blog post congratulations you are my hero.
This is Joshua D.B. saying thank you and out.